NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
