can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Success! We fucked roommates!
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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