I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
Randomize
