Swine flu. Run for my life!
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
I mixed the ketchup wit the mustard in one bottle to save time making hotdogs
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Randomize
