I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
