i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
