woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
only you would photoshop your dick
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
So vagazzling was a success
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
Randomize
