this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
Randomize
