Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
