In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
