Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
Randomize
