fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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