i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Randomize