Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Randomize
