i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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