if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
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