batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
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