I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
