if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
