And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
