He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
