Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
When are your genitals available?
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
