You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
You're a womanizer and a bitch.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
