The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
