why didn't you poke me back
I'm really into asian looking animals
I hope mine doesn't look like that
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
