So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
We're too hungover to prance.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
