i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
