I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
