these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize
