in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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