I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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