Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
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