I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
The beer is more important than you right now.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
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