i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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