you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
How's work?
Spinning.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
