My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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