So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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