I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
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