lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Randomize
