I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize