how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
