11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
