What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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