I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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