yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
where are my eyebrows?
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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