if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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