found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
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