At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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