There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
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