I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
