glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Randomize
